Shame on me...again.

I've been a terrible blogger.

Much has happened and although I never post everyday, I've let many important things go by.

My birthday for one! Another year older, and hopefully wiser.

But more important than mine, Patient-Sunshine celebrated her one year birthday during my blog silence.

For her birthday, she and I went to a little Jazz Concert at this coffee shop. She really liked it. If I've not mentioned it before she loves music as I'm sure most kids do. But reeeeally loves it. So for her to see the person in front of her singing was like "wow!" She tried her best to mimic the vocalist and repeat her song when she'd pause. The audience got a kick out of that and it was quite precious and she really paid attention.

My Dad's been diagnosed with prostate cancer. Although I've known for a while now, I'm still not sure how to feel about it. His spirits are really good and I'm hoping that counts for A LOT! He's scheduled for surgery soon.

Work has been incredibly busy and I'm simply exhausted. I'm up because I'm supposed to be preparing for an event I have on Saturday but as you can see, I'm not. Other than that, I suppose I have no complaints. Things are good and life is moving along. Since I'm so behind, I owe this to my little one. I meant to do it almost a month ago. I found it in my journal written March 28, 2007. One day before my birthday and exactly 8 days before I would be blessed with her presence. She has changed my life in so many ways. After I read this I just felt so.....so....I dunno. This post is also for those of you that were so supportive to me during my time of pregnancy and hormone insanity. You know who you are. Your blog presence and willingness to read my ramblings made all the difference in the world. So here it goes:

For Patient-Sunshine

Dear Patient-Sunshine,

It's almost time!!!

We are in the final days before you make your entrance and we finally meet face to face. Our time together building that womb connection has been interesting, and special. I'm going to miss feeling you inside my belly, wondering what your doing, what you look like, what you are hearing...but I'm sure it won't compare to actually seeing your face and bridging that gap.

I believe the look you gave me in the dream, that "We are going to have so much fun together" look, was accurate. I'm looking forward to all I have to learn from you. The getting tired but being okay with it. Wanting desperately to go to sleep but being so excited to see your face the next morning. Wanting someone to babysit but not wanting to let you out of my sight. You and I have made it through a rough time already. You are already such an inspiration to me.

I just wanted to say that I love you, I'm excited to meet you and that words cannot express how amped I am for this experience although I know it may not always be easy. I hope that I can provide you with all that you need. Already I am honored that you selected me to be your mother.

With the utmost love, anticipation and respect,

Your Mommy

"Sunshine Momma"