U go sleepy! And other babble

...I should be sleeping. But what else is new. The only reason I stay up after the baby is because it's "my time". Now I think I've taken it too far. I fall asleep on the couch, wake up at 2am, feed the baby, she goes back to sleep, I go back to the couch thinking I'm going to finish x-files or ...something, fall asleep again, wake up at 4am, then go to bed. ...Only to wake up by 9 or 10am, only today we woke up at 11:45. That's not good. I have too many things to do to be doin that. And I couldn't believe the baby slept that long with me! Needless to say tonite was not so good. I think it threw off her afternoon nap and then she wouldn't finally go to sleep until about eleven tonite...she was a bit fussier than usual but then she just chilled and played in her crib. Maaan...

Yeah...it's probably safe to say I've officially reached a baby limit sort of. Obviously my options for "relief" are limited. But I will say that it's probably time to be a bit more proactive about creating some balance. I'm actually looking forward to working outside the home now. Soon I won't be able to socialize with adults! ...hell, I probably can't now! It's all wierd. I mean, if they don't coo and laugh at random things, demand that I feed them, change them or entertain them, god forbid they just wanna talk. Cause then oh, hey, uh....I can't communicate with the likes of you. I have to say, I think I've done pretty well being that I'm with baby 98% of the time. Okay, 99%...fuck it, 100% of the time. I would have expected that I'd have gone crazy much sooner but, I'm hangin on. And of course she's still precious, I mean jeez. It's funny what you can do when there's really no other option. I don't think I even paid attention to it until the pediatrician was like, "what about you?...are youuuu...okay?" After that she kind of alluded to the fact that because I was a single parent, that was a big deal --and it probably is however. Here comes the however which is, when you don't have any other option, you do what you must. There's no room for me to fall apart HOWEVA!...If there was some don't think I wouldn't take full advantage of it.

Tomorrow I have my "Strong Women" meeting. Can I just say I'm sooo looking forward to it moreso than I ever have? Just to socialize with some other women, get my free dinner that I don't have to cook and just chat. They offer free child care too but of course the little one is too young to go in there. But if she were????? Oh yeah...I'd be takin advantage of that too. Enough about that...

Today I kinda slacked on the resume action. I did finish editing the wedding pics in time for my photo partner to come and pick them up. He was impressed which was nice. I got one load of laundry done....I only told N.J. to go to her crate five times instead of five hundred...Oh! I did manage to make dinner that didn't come from a box again: "Chicken Fried" Portabella mushrooms and potatoes...but I got to tired to cook a vegetable...aaaaand um, I only ate two cookies instead of three. ...Oh and there was love. And the Sunshine of course. There.

Stay tuned for part two of this post titled: "Am I interesting anymore? Mmm, not so much".

Good nite...I mean Good day.